Last weekend, I was in position hear about some pretty hair raising events as I spent my last bit of holiday time with my parents in Middle of Nowhere, Mississippi.
A local woman had parked her car on the side of the road to referee a squabble her kids were having in the back seat, and a might or might not be local critter decided it was the perfect oppurtunity to pull over, produce a pistol, and demand she hand over any portable valuables she might have "or else".
As most guides to these situations recommend, the lady handed over her purse, phone, watch, etc. because none of that's worth your life, right? So, once he was satisfied that she'd given him everything of value she had on her, the critter put the gun TO HER FOREHEAD and pulled the trigger.
Thank God the gun misfired and she was able to crank up and drive off before the Tragic Victim of Society could clear up the problems with his weapon, and finish his job of either killing Momma in front of the children, or possibly going for a gold star in Getting Rid of Potential Witnesses and sparing the kiddoes the pain of growing up in a single parent household.
I'm not going to say she was wrong to handle the situation the way she did because her children were right in the line of fire if things went rodeo, but brothers and sisters, when I leave this vale of tears, it's not going to be after handing some gun waving gaboon viper everything he or (let me be politically correct) she wants.
The idea that one should comply with whatever demands a weapon waving slimeball might make vs fighting back is the same pig headedness that motivated Neville Chamberlain when he decided to go for "peace in our time" by handing over OTHER people's countries to Wehrmacht waving psychopath Adolph Hitler. After which a content Hitler settled down to peacably govern his newly annexed territories and...oh wait. That's not what happened at all.
Sure, a reasonable person would just take the wallet/Czechoslovakia and go on their way, but how many reasonable people go into the business of armed robbery to start with?
Looking at these situations from a probability standpoint, and assuming the variables of one Bad Guy with Gun and Me by Myself, there are two possible outcomes for me folding like a card table and doing what he wants.
1. My docile demeanor pleases him, so he takes my stuff and leaves me alive.
2. For whatever reason, be it too much coffee, a rage at the inherent inequality in the American system of governance, or the fact that Father Dagon and Mother Hydra are hi jacking the DEA's mind control satellites to force him into it, he pulls the trigger and empties whatever firearm he's carrying into my soon to be corpse.
So...a 50/50 chance of a win in this particular game. Not that good, all things considered.
Now, what if I go with what's behind Door Number Two, Fight to the Death?
1. He kills me. Well, not to be too blunt about it, in the long run we're all worm food anyway, I don't have wife or kids that need supporting, and my parents have two other children to take care of them in their old age.
2. I kill him. A sad and sorrowful event, to be sure, that the educational, social, and religious institutions failed Mr. Critter to the point that he met an untimely end at my hand....but since I've shifted all responsibility onto said instituions (plus violent video games, violent movies, Dungeons and Dragons, or whatever it social Boogeyman is turning our children into killers this decade) I'm sure with enough therapy I can learn to sleep at night, again.
3. We tie. On one hand, this would seem to combine everything that is bad about option #1 with everything bad about #2, but let's take a closer look.
I die, go to Heaven, and spend eternity in the clouds with Jesus, J.R.R. Tolkien, and Johnny Cash.
Mr. Critter dies, goes to Hell, and spends eternity cleaning Chairman Mao's hemmorhoids with his tongue.
I believe I can count this as "winning".
Or, for my atheist friends, we die and fufill our ultimate destiny of pushing up daisies. It's a bit humbling to admit it, but I have accepted that is is unlikely I will ever make a Great Discovery that will provide Immense Benefit To Posterity, like Penicilin, Plastics, or Peanut Butter. And I've already established my particular family unit can get along without me.
But! Since Mr. Critter is also providing a smorgasboard for the local foliage, he WON'T be robbing and possibly murdering any other members of our species, who MIGHT concievably have small children to raise or be one week away from curing cancer. So society as a whole still receives a net benefit. Once again, I win.
Granted, this little calculation of societal benefits and losses falls apart if Mr. Critter is one week away from making a Discovery of Immense Benefit to Posterity, and has only turned to robbery to support his research for the short time he needs before it turns a profit. Then again, in Option #3 I wouldn't be around to realize the benefits of said discovery, so what do I care?
So...by fighting back I actually improve my chances of winning from half and half to two out of three. The math clearly shows that we should leave Neville Chamberlain on the ash heap of history where he belongs, and instead adopt the much sounder methods of Sir Winston Churchill, who never, ever, ever gave up. Let's roll.
A local woman had parked her car on the side of the road to referee a squabble her kids were having in the back seat, and a might or might not be local critter decided it was the perfect oppurtunity to pull over, produce a pistol, and demand she hand over any portable valuables she might have "or else".
As most guides to these situations recommend, the lady handed over her purse, phone, watch, etc. because none of that's worth your life, right? So, once he was satisfied that she'd given him everything of value she had on her, the critter put the gun TO HER FOREHEAD and pulled the trigger.
Thank God the gun misfired and she was able to crank up and drive off before the Tragic Victim of Society could clear up the problems with his weapon, and finish his job of either killing Momma in front of the children, or possibly going for a gold star in Getting Rid of Potential Witnesses and sparing the kiddoes the pain of growing up in a single parent household.
I'm not going to say she was wrong to handle the situation the way she did because her children were right in the line of fire if things went rodeo, but brothers and sisters, when I leave this vale of tears, it's not going to be after handing some gun waving gaboon viper everything he or (let me be politically correct) she wants.
The idea that one should comply with whatever demands a weapon waving slimeball might make vs fighting back is the same pig headedness that motivated Neville Chamberlain when he decided to go for "peace in our time" by handing over OTHER people's countries to Wehrmacht waving psychopath Adolph Hitler. After which a content Hitler settled down to peacably govern his newly annexed territories and...oh wait. That's not what happened at all.
Sure, a reasonable person would just take the wallet/Czechoslovakia and go on their way, but how many reasonable people go into the business of armed robbery to start with?
Looking at these situations from a probability standpoint, and assuming the variables of one Bad Guy with Gun and Me by Myself, there are two possible outcomes for me folding like a card table and doing what he wants.
1. My docile demeanor pleases him, so he takes my stuff and leaves me alive.
2. For whatever reason, be it too much coffee, a rage at the inherent inequality in the American system of governance, or the fact that Father Dagon and Mother Hydra are hi jacking the DEA's mind control satellites to force him into it, he pulls the trigger and empties whatever firearm he's carrying into my soon to be corpse.
So...a 50/50 chance of a win in this particular game. Not that good, all things considered.
Now, what if I go with what's behind Door Number Two, Fight to the Death?
1. He kills me. Well, not to be too blunt about it, in the long run we're all worm food anyway, I don't have wife or kids that need supporting, and my parents have two other children to take care of them in their old age.
2. I kill him. A sad and sorrowful event, to be sure, that the educational, social, and religious institutions failed Mr. Critter to the point that he met an untimely end at my hand....but since I've shifted all responsibility onto said instituions (plus violent video games, violent movies, Dungeons and Dragons, or whatever it social Boogeyman is turning our children into killers this decade) I'm sure with enough therapy I can learn to sleep at night, again.
3. We tie. On one hand, this would seem to combine everything that is bad about option #1 with everything bad about #2, but let's take a closer look.
I die, go to Heaven, and spend eternity in the clouds with Jesus, J.R.R. Tolkien, and Johnny Cash.
Mr. Critter dies, goes to Hell, and spends eternity cleaning Chairman Mao's hemmorhoids with his tongue.
I believe I can count this as "winning".
Or, for my atheist friends, we die and fufill our ultimate destiny of pushing up daisies. It's a bit humbling to admit it, but I have accepted that is is unlikely I will ever make a Great Discovery that will provide Immense Benefit To Posterity, like Penicilin, Plastics, or Peanut Butter. And I've already established my particular family unit can get along without me.
But! Since Mr. Critter is also providing a smorgasboard for the local foliage, he WON'T be robbing and possibly murdering any other members of our species, who MIGHT concievably have small children to raise or be one week away from curing cancer. So society as a whole still receives a net benefit. Once again, I win.
Granted, this little calculation of societal benefits and losses falls apart if Mr. Critter is one week away from making a Discovery of Immense Benefit to Posterity, and has only turned to robbery to support his research for the short time he needs before it turns a profit. Then again, in Option #3 I wouldn't be around to realize the benefits of said discovery, so what do I care?
So...by fighting back I actually improve my chances of winning from half and half to two out of three. The math clearly shows that we should leave Neville Chamberlain on the ash heap of history where he belongs, and instead adopt the much sounder methods of Sir Winston Churchill, who never, ever, ever gave up. Let's roll.